Weekend in Denver - Wilderness Edition - Day 2
I woke up in what felt like 100 degree weather - man, that tent retained heat. I have to say, waking up outdoors is a seriously awesome feeling - I just laid there, listening to the river rushing below us. I felt inspired and alive and briefly fantasized about getting out and doing yoga in the quiet of the mountain, but soon remembered that I only knew 2 yoga positions, and besides, there were fire ants out there. Also, no mat. After a few minutes, I couldn't take the heat or the fact that I had no idea what time it was, and I finally got up.
It was around 9:00 a.m. Nick and Emily were already up and slowly beginning to pack up things. We finally got all our stuff together, and managed to get Nick's truck back onto the main road. Our plan was to head back to the Lodge and grab breakfast, and then go white water rafting. Okay, not really white water rafting, just regular rafting, but there were some Class 1 and Class 2 rapids. I had high hopes of not encountering the inept waitress we had last night - surely she wouldn't do a double shift. Sadly, we found ourself faced with an even more inept hippie trash whore waitress (sporting a scrunchy btw - yuck) who either forgot to place our order...or I don't know what. She seriously emanated Krissy Snow vibes from Three's Company but with a bad temper. After waiting an hour for our food, all it took was one sarcastic comment from Max for her to tell us we could leave. So we did.
Emily had heard of a bbq place not too far away up the river, so we rented two duckies (floatable canoe type things) and drove up to the bbq place, which was right next to where we would start our lazy float down the river. "KK's Barbecue" turned out not to be a restaurant, but rather, a small shanty/shack managed by KK herself - a strange old mountain woman who was probably in her 60's but looked about 80. Clearly, a woman who had never heard of the word sunscreen in her youth and every so often, we'd get an unfortunate flash of super wrinkly cleavage. There was hammock nearby, a couple picnic tables, and some crazy old guy playing the harmonica and guitar. When we first got there she told us she wouldn't be open until noon because she spent the whole night peeling peaches for her homemade palisades peach pie, oh my oh my. Seriously, every time she said the words "peach pie" they were followed by "oh my oh my." In her hair, she sported a scrunchy, two pens, and a flower mini-windmill. In one ear dangled a big daisy and heart earring - in the other ear dangled only a heart earring. Bizarre. More bizarre was her menu, which was pretty limited and had no prices listed. The thing is, the Lodge and KK's were the only two places serving food in the entire area. When she finally "opened" she rang a bunch of cowbells. She had a strict "1 napkin per customer rule" and made fun of me when I asked for a second piece of wax paper (not a napkin, which was what prompted me to ask) for my second rib. My first rib came on a piece of wax paper, and rather than giving me a second rib wrapped in wax paper, she just plopped my second rib on my first eaten rib and I didn't think it was a big deal to ask for another piece of wax paper but it came with a big lecture about "you city folks cutting into my profits..." and something about "back in the day you'd just lick your fingers and wipe em on yer pants" I'm sure she makes a hell of a profit considering the fact that our meal of two ribs, 3 burgers, 2 pieces of pie, 1 corn, and one beer came out to $47. Cash only. Profits my ass - just give me the damn piece of wax paper.
So, after finally eating food some five hours after we woke up, we got into our duckies and headed down the river. Max and I shared one - me in the front, Max in the back. I'd have to say he probably did nearly all of the paddling as I enjoyed our ride down the river. Once in a while, I'd "help out" and sort of haplessly fling my paddle around. The rapids were super fun and exciting, and I did my best to channel Meryl Streep in River Wild while we went through them. Actually, I just held on to my paddle and tried to keep my balance, per Max's suggestion, for every time I tried to paddle in the rapids, we'd get turned sideways and risked tipping over. It was so much fun! At one point, I announced to Max that now I was officially an "Outdoors Girl." No less than a minute later, I let out a shrill scream when a dragon fly landed on my arm.
We finally got back and changed into our dry clothes. I realized it was about 3 p.m. and I hadn't peed all day and finally had to brave a port-a-potty. So so so gross. I don't know how any one can use a port-a-potty without seriously feeling sick. Thank god for Purrell.
Anyway, we parted ways with Emily and Nick and headed back to Denver. We spent Sunday night just resting on the couch. I've always said that Max knows me really well and sometimes it really does scare me. After checking with the channel guide, I asked him, excited, "Hey, guess what's on tv tonight??" and he guessed "Rush Hour." It was Rush Hour 2.
It was around 9:00 a.m. Nick and Emily were already up and slowly beginning to pack up things. We finally got all our stuff together, and managed to get Nick's truck back onto the main road. Our plan was to head back to the Lodge and grab breakfast, and then go white water rafting. Okay, not really white water rafting, just regular rafting, but there were some Class 1 and Class 2 rapids. I had high hopes of not encountering the inept waitress we had last night - surely she wouldn't do a double shift. Sadly, we found ourself faced with an even more inept hippie trash whore waitress (sporting a scrunchy btw - yuck) who either forgot to place our order...or I don't know what. She seriously emanated Krissy Snow vibes from Three's Company but with a bad temper. After waiting an hour for our food, all it took was one sarcastic comment from Max for her to tell us we could leave. So we did.
Emily had heard of a bbq place not too far away up the river, so we rented two duckies (floatable canoe type things) and drove up to the bbq place, which was right next to where we would start our lazy float down the river. "KK's Barbecue" turned out not to be a restaurant, but rather, a small shanty/shack managed by KK herself - a strange old mountain woman who was probably in her 60's but looked about 80. Clearly, a woman who had never heard of the word sunscreen in her youth and every so often, we'd get an unfortunate flash of super wrinkly cleavage. There was hammock nearby, a couple picnic tables, and some crazy old guy playing the harmonica and guitar. When we first got there she told us she wouldn't be open until noon because she spent the whole night peeling peaches for her homemade palisades peach pie, oh my oh my. Seriously, every time she said the words "peach pie" they were followed by "oh my oh my." In her hair, she sported a scrunchy, two pens, and a flower mini-windmill. In one ear dangled a big daisy and heart earring - in the other ear dangled only a heart earring. Bizarre. More bizarre was her menu, which was pretty limited and had no prices listed. The thing is, the Lodge and KK's were the only two places serving food in the entire area. When she finally "opened" she rang a bunch of cowbells. She had a strict "1 napkin per customer rule" and made fun of me when I asked for a second piece of wax paper (not a napkin, which was what prompted me to ask) for my second rib. My first rib came on a piece of wax paper, and rather than giving me a second rib wrapped in wax paper, she just plopped my second rib on my first eaten rib and I didn't think it was a big deal to ask for another piece of wax paper but it came with a big lecture about "you city folks cutting into my profits..." and something about "back in the day you'd just lick your fingers and wipe em on yer pants" I'm sure she makes a hell of a profit considering the fact that our meal of two ribs, 3 burgers, 2 pieces of pie, 1 corn, and one beer came out to $47. Cash only. Profits my ass - just give me the damn piece of wax paper.
So, after finally eating food some five hours after we woke up, we got into our duckies and headed down the river. Max and I shared one - me in the front, Max in the back. I'd have to say he probably did nearly all of the paddling as I enjoyed our ride down the river. Once in a while, I'd "help out" and sort of haplessly fling my paddle around. The rapids were super fun and exciting, and I did my best to channel Meryl Streep in River Wild while we went through them. Actually, I just held on to my paddle and tried to keep my balance, per Max's suggestion, for every time I tried to paddle in the rapids, we'd get turned sideways and risked tipping over. It was so much fun! At one point, I announced to Max that now I was officially an "Outdoors Girl." No less than a minute later, I let out a shrill scream when a dragon fly landed on my arm.
We finally got back and changed into our dry clothes. I realized it was about 3 p.m. and I hadn't peed all day and finally had to brave a port-a-potty. So so so gross. I don't know how any one can use a port-a-potty without seriously feeling sick. Thank god for Purrell.
Anyway, we parted ways with Emily and Nick and headed back to Denver. We spent Sunday night just resting on the couch. I've always said that Max knows me really well and sometimes it really does scare me. After checking with the channel guide, I asked him, excited, "Hey, guess what's on tv tonight??" and he guessed "Rush Hour." It was Rush Hour 2.
posted by S at 5:21 PM
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