Signs
You know it's been too long since you've been to the gym when....
1.) You can't open ANYTHING with a lid or a cap - pickle jars, ketchup bottles, tubes of toothpaste, etc - and you find yourself constantly accusing your boyfriend of overtightening things.
2.) Your arms get tired from SHAMPOOING YOUR OWN HAIR.
3.) Laundry is so so so HEAVY.
4.) You think to yourself while you're walking up to your second floor apartment, "%*#$! Definitely need to (huff) get an apartment (huff) on the ground floor next time..."
5.) Nothing fits you at all, except for a pair of sweatpants. Which you convince yourself are considered "business casual" since they're black.
6.) You've completely forgotten the combination of your gym lock.
7.) You know that if you were to play Connect-the-Dimples, the backs of your thighs would look like Jackson Pollock paintings. (sadly no one in my family knows what I'm talking about - apparently everyone is blissfully cellulite-free - damn where was I when they were handing out those genes?)
Oh, and for the doggie owners, you know it's time put your dog on a diet when...
she gets stuck between the two front seats while crawling from the front of the car to the back!
Man, Pig and I are a mess.
1.) You can't open ANYTHING with a lid or a cap - pickle jars, ketchup bottles, tubes of toothpaste, etc - and you find yourself constantly accusing your boyfriend of overtightening things.
2.) Your arms get tired from SHAMPOOING YOUR OWN HAIR.
3.) Laundry is so so so HEAVY.
4.) You think to yourself while you're walking up to your second floor apartment, "%*#$! Definitely need to (huff) get an apartment (huff) on the ground floor next time..."
5.) Nothing fits you at all, except for a pair of sweatpants. Which you convince yourself are considered "business casual" since they're black.
6.) You've completely forgotten the combination of your gym lock.
7.) You know that if you were to play Connect-the-Dimples, the backs of your thighs would look like Jackson Pollock paintings. (sadly no one in my family knows what I'm talking about - apparently everyone is blissfully cellulite-free - damn where was I when they were handing out those genes?)
Oh, and for the doggie owners, you know it's time put your dog on a diet when...
she gets stuck between the two front seats while crawling from the front of the car to the back!
Man, Pig and I are a mess.